If there's anything that has affected me by living in Mexico, maybe something that has had the biggest impact on me has been the realization of the beauty and value in the small things that life holds. Or, maybe it's the realization that the so-called "small things" in life, like human connection and expression or natural beauty or divinity, are really not so small after all. I see in the U.S. a society where humanity is denied and repressed and thus, ideas such as faith and spontaneity must be marginalized. Ah, the small things in life, if only we had more time, more money, more of them, wouldn't that be nice? People say this to themselves and continue on, wanting more, being afraid of losing what they already have, and never really questioning: Why do we choose to deny ourselves the things that are truly fulfilling to us in exchange for pursuing a course of life that we perceive is "acceptable?" Where does this idea of what is acceptable come from? Why are people rigidly defined early in life and reprimanded or isolated if they deviate from the expectations of others? Do I really need a resumé to be happy? I've met so many folks these past couple of years who would simply laugh at the latter question.
And just because you know that opportunities exist, does that mean you should take them? or even consider them? Does the privelege of knowing equal an obligation of accepting?
Sorry folks, I won't be working at a big-name corporation or NGO soon. I'd like to keep my life simple for now....and enjoy moments like when one of the Casa del Pan regulars, a young French lady, says, "Can you make the orange-papaya juice the way you always make it? Siempre queda riquisimo." Or days that revolve around hunting down a certain ingredient, or nights that revolve around finding the right onda, or relationships that revolve around something more than just geography and responsibility.
Ok, I have a resume. Will I use it soon? Can't say. But I'm happy. Nothing like descending on one of San Cristobal's city hills, seeing the sun drop zig zags of gold on the stones in the streets, the red-roofed homes and flowers and relative stillness of a still-small city, all surrounded by green hills and clouds, breathing in air that is always cool and fresh, sometimes moist and sometimes not, thinking "I could live here forever, couldn't I?," feeling very alive and then laughing at yourself when you slip on the steep sloping sidewalk. I'm not sure I could ask for more, or if I even should.
08 May 2008
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